The abridged "history of my life" page.
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My old job in the military was the Great Value version of your favorite 007 movies.
 
Due to successfully Christmas-treeing a few exams and running fast, I was lucky enough to be awarded a TS/SCI security clearance. For six years, I was an essential asset to the nonexistent mission of a nameless organization operating somewhere in the world in support of good people.
Along with bad knees, the military gifted me with the ability to eat a punch and deliver a punchline.
Now, I'm a copywriter.